no, I don't want to see something gross

Saw Doc G this morning for my 20-week appointment. It was no-nonsense: no needles, no ultrasounds, no fetal heartrate monitoring. They took my blood pressure and made me step on a scale. Other than that, it involved a quick 10-minute chat. The real story is about my cab ride downtown. But I'll save that for the end.

Doc G reviewed my Level II ultrasound results. He reiterated that Tater is large but proportional. Learned that my placenta is in front. Which means it will take a bit longer for me to feel fetal movement, and from there on out I will feel it less often. He assures me that I will be thankful for this in the long run. No cause for concern; shouldn't affect delivery. I've heard a rumor from Liz (via her fiance Alap who is a doctor, i.e., a pretty solid source) that this might mean I'll look bigger as the pregnancy progresses. Fabulous. (I can't wait to be balance-challenged during a Chicago winter.)

Doc G was happy to see that none of the soft markers for Down Syndrome were detected. Apparently there are ten of them, and some are very loosely correlated with Downs. But having one or two pop up can cause parents to worry quite a bit. So he said it was reassuring to see that everything looked normal. Ultrasounds only detect 60-70% of Down Syndrome babies, so the risk isn't totally behind us. But we can relax a little.

Brain looked good. Heart looked good.

We also discussed was what to expect at the next few appointments. My 24-week appointment will be with one of the other doctors in the practice. For the 28-week appointment I'll be back with Doc G. That's the next time they'll run a battery of tests. I was wondering whether I should take an iron supplement (with the vegetarian diet). Doc G says I'm good for now. Levels were normal when they first checked early in the pregnancy. They will check again at 28-weeks and he'll put me on a supplement if need be. Until then, I'm eating my spinach like a good Popeye.

He also forewarned me about the diabetes testing that will be done at 28-weeks. I've heard horror stories about that one. Apparently (and this is based on hearsay, not Doc G), I will fast for a period of time (like, overnight) and then go in for the test which involves drinking a disgusting "beverage" and then twiddling my thumbs for an hour. At the end of the hour they test my blood. If whatever they are looking for is not normal, you go through it again, only the second time around you have to twiddle your thumbs for three hours.

I told Doc G that I had heard not great things about the Diabetes test and he responded, "No! It's better now." I'm thinking less fasting or less thumb twiddling. No such luck. He explained that they have changed from orange flavor to fruit punch flavor. This is an improvement? An improvement is from clay flavor to fruit punch flavor. Personally, I think fruit punch is gross. I'd prefer orange. Oh well, it's a minor bump in the pregnancy road.

We also need to sign up for prenatal classes at Prentice. Planning to register this weekend, shooting to take the classes in January. One of the classes involves a full day of hospital touring, registration, and a step-by-step explanation of the delivery process, featuring "antiquated" videos which will make me 100% certain about getting an epidural (per Doc G). Giddy-up.

All-in-all, a quick, easy, and positive appointment. Blood pressure looks good. Weight gain is normal. (Shooting to pack on no more than 35 pounds. He says I've gained 17 pounds to-date. I think I've gained 14 pounds. I believe 3-pound difference is attributable to my shoes and scarf and heavier-than-normal pants. Or maybe my home scale is just kind and gentle.)

So that's the good news. Ready for the cab story? It's a good one. You'll be happy you stuck around.

I pre-ordered the cab last night for an 8:30 a.m. pick-up. I love the Flash Cab company. They almost always show up on time and they don't gripe when you want to pay with a credit card. Only snag is that they often show up well ahead of time, and you can only ask the cab to wait for five minutes. I forgot about this quirk when I was timing my morning routine. The cab arrived before I took Maggie outside, so Maggie's morning walk became a walk/run. Brought her back inside, grabbed my things, threw a treat in her direction, and raced downstairs. Jumped in the cab and tried to catch my breath. The cigarette aroma in the taxi was not all that welcoming, but I was happy to be off my feat.

The cabbie had been listening to a morning talk show (KISS FM) at a pretty high volume while he'd been waiting. Shortly after I entered, he reached for the volume knob, presumably to turn it down to a reasonable level. Nope, turned it up. And the speaker was right behind my head. Here's how the conversation played out from there:

Me: Would you mind turning that down? It's a bit loud and right behind my head.
Cabbie: [Turns it off.] I really wanted to listen to that.
Me: You're welcome to listen to it. It was just too loud.
Cabbie: I can't hear it if it isn't that loud.
Me: Don't you have speakers in front?
Cabbie: I don't know how to get it to play up here.
Me: [Thinking, perhaps I should explain the balance knob to this fella, as a good-will gesture towards his future fares.]
Cabbie: I think you're just trying to be mean to me.
Me: Nope.
Cabbie: Are you a mean person?
Me: No.
Cabbie: What do you do?
Me: Lawyer.
Cabbie: Lawyers are mean.
Me: Thanks.
Cabbie: What kind of lawyer?
Me: Indigent criminal defense.
Cabbie: Ooh! Like on A Few Good Men?
Me: Not exactly.
[Brief conversation wherein I explain that court is not nearly that dramatic, and then try to explain what an appellate attorney does. Then a moment of silence.]
Cabbie: Would you prefer to sit in the front?
Me: WHAT?
Cabbie: Would you prefer to sit in the front seat?
Me: No. I prefer to sit in the back seat.
[Moment of silence.]
Cabbie: Want to see something gross?
Me: No.
Cabbie: Do you eat dog?
Me: WHAT? No. That's disgusting. No.
Cabbie: I want to show you a picture. It's of people eating dog. [Cabbie begins messing with his cell phone while he is merging onto the busy freeway. God help me.]
Me: NO. I do not want to see that picture. That is awful.
Cabbie: [Begins describing the picture.]
Me: I do not want to have this conversation. This is absolutely disgusting.
[Moment of silence.]
Cabbie: Do you not like talking to cab drivers?
Me: It's not that. I just have a lot of work to finish before I arrive at my destination. [Lie. I have decided to focus exclusively on my phone to avoid eye-contact. I also had been simulcasting this conversation to Brad via text message. So at least I look like I'm feverishly working.]

Cabbie begins telling me about a conversation he had with a woman he picked up the previous day, which made no sense. I told him that I didn't understand, but really had to get my work done. We spent the next fifteen minutes in silence, as I did not look away from my phone. I had crazy motion sickness upon arrival, but it was worth it. After he ran my credit card (mild concern that he has that information), he apologized for talking too much. Yeah, that's it. I'm upset because you talk too much. Nothing to do with your front-seat invitation or your preferred topics of conversation. Dog eating? Shivers.

I cannot wait to get home and hug Maggie.